Struggling

I’m really struggling with my feelings about working right now. I miss my son like crazy. I just want to cuddle him and play with him and watch him learn and explore and grow. Staying home just isn’t an option at this point in time for me. My husband first has to have a stable, family wage job and we want to be out of debt and have a savings before I stay home again. It may be a couple of years, it may be never. Who knows. All I know is that it breaks my heart to walk away from Carter every day, knowing I’m not going to see him for 9 hours and that I’m going to miss him like crazy all day long. I know I’m doing what I have to to provide for him, to provide him some stability and the things my family needs but that doesn’t make it any easier. I miss this face